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Don't Give Up!

Don't Give Up! - No matter how bad things get, keep going, fight and things will improve. You can do it, you will get there - don't you dare give up! I've had my fair share of upsets and failures, but I've learned from them.

Please don't get the wrong idea about this page. It's not a lecture, nor do I want praise for my achievements and I don't want sympathy. All that I want is to give you a boost and show you that things will get better if you keep striving. We all have hurdles to overcome and some of them are huge, many of you will face bigger problems than I have, but if you face up to them, most things can be overcome. I would sooner go down fighting, knowing that I had tried my hardest, rather than give up and wait for the end.

Okay, here we go. The following obstacles I've overcome are presented in no particular order, but I'm over most of them and have learned to deal with the others.

When I was in my early twenties, I was asked out by a Sikh girl. She had a Sikh boyfriend who she still wanted to see. I said no, she agreed and we went out for a few weeks, our relationship progressed and things were fine, however it was then that we found out that she was pregnant. The father was her previous boyfriend and she made the decision to have an abortion. I stood by her, guided her through it all and as far as I know her ex was not aware of any of this. What was my reward for standing by her? She dumped me and a few months later went back to her ex. I did not go out with anyone for 2 1/2 years, as this was the last of a series of relationships that had failed.

I thought I would stay single, to avoid the hurt. Deep down though I knew there was someone out there who was right for me. By not giving up I met another woman, who is now my wife. Infact, I had been friends with her seven years earlier. We are very happily married, have one child and are expecting our second child in December. Would this have happened if I had given up on relationships?

When I bought my first car - an MG Metro, I worked as an assistant store manager for Toys R Us. I had a pretty well paid job and life was good. This all changed when there was a torrential downpour after a long hot spell in 1991. I was driving in my car when we encountered a large water puddle, due to a blocked drain on an A-road. I was only doing just over 40 miles an hour when my car aquaplaned and my car was thrown into the opposite lane of traffic where I had a head on crash with a Ford Fiesta. Both cars were written off. I wasn't badly hurt and I saw the driver of the other car and she looked okay. I went to hospital and was given the all clear later that day. It was later that evening that I discovered that the passenger in the other car, a lady of 78 died on the way to hospital. What made matters worse, was that the car I had bought a week earlier had incorrectly inflated tyres and the Car Insurance Company said my insurance was therefore invalid.

Did I give up or end it all? I certainly felt like it. However, I took the bull by the horns. I hired a solicitor to help deal with the major problem I faced. The case was eventually settled, the insurance company finally paid up, as it was proven that the council had neglected their duty to keep the drains clear of pine needles, thus causing the water build up. There were also no signs, to warn motorists of flooding. The episode cost me over 1000 and I was given two CU30s for three years. The accident still bothers me, but I am reassured it was not entirely my fault. If I had not fought the insurance company matters would have been much worse, I didn't give up, so don't you!

My father died when I was 32. He had been ill for a few weeks, having beaten two heart attacks 5 years earlier. We knew he was dying, but did not realise he would go as soon as he did. I never got to say goodbye, as he was too tired to talk to me the night before, having been at the hospital earlier that day - he died in the early hours the next day. I miss him more each day, but as I get older I discover new ways of dealing with it. My father had a fantastic skill, he was a Master Builder and had a successful business - I had the best childhood anyone could have, I have many happy memories. Therefore, I decided to set up my own business Cherry Tree Home and Garden Services. I had great hopes and tried for five years, my last year was my best, then disaster - my wife was made redundant and the phone didn't ring for four months, as I had concentrated on decorating during the previous year. This was the final straw, in truth we were in debt due to my business not making consistent money and we had been rennovating our period property.

With a young son, no money, a half finished house and no jobs, I made a life changing decision. I told my wife that while she was looking for a job, I was going to find one! Three weeks later I had a new job and was learning web design from scratch. I had given up my business and thanks to Zyra Internet, the future looks much brighter - incidentally I started this new career at 37! I refused to finish my days on a low and believe me I was very low. By turning a negative into a positive, life just gets better - there's a way to go yet, but I'll get there through hard work! I often work on this site well after midnight!!

Many more bad things have happened in my life, as I'm sure that they have in yours. We lost our first child, my father-in-law was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer (he is currently undergoing radio therapy) and I still have a broken bone in my leg as a result of an accident when I was eleven, but it's time to bring this page to an end. Whatever, happens no matter how tough life gets, turn round face it and bite it's backside. Don't you give up on me and I'll not give up on you! If you know, you're going to fail, there might still be a glimmer of hope, it's better to go down fighting. The only person who can help you is you, no one else - you are in charge of your own destiny, if you've mucked it up so far - take control, grab life by the throat and give yourself the life you deserve!

The future is bright and my hair is orange!

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Thank you for reading this page, just by reading it you are helping feel better about myself. If this page has made you more positive and encouraged you to face your fears, good luck to you! If you would like to drop us an email, please visit our Contact page.